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May 26, 2001
Readers, we'll never end gun violence with current gun control strategies. I have a workable plan.
Two arguments advanced by the NRA are: Banning guns violates the 2nd Amendment guarantee of the right to bear arms; and, it is too late to ban guns because there are so many out there already. To this I say: Ban bullets.
The 2nd Amendment says "arms." Arms are guns, not bullets. If the Founding Fathers wanted to protect bullets, they could have said so. Here I use the strict-construction technique favored by Charlton Heston.
Unlike guns, bullets eventually get used up. Those that don't get used will be hoarded for "home protection" and for defense against the Zionist federal government. Through being hoarded or spent, bullets will disappear. No bullets, no gun deaths. And anyone caught manufacturing or smuggling bullets after the ban will be executed. I'm not talking here about lethal injections or some pussy-ass death like that. I'm talking medieval torture and slow, cruel, public executions. In other words, the same penalty I would mete out to litterers and people who talk in movie theaters. (Please note I have removed from my capital punishment list those people who use telephones while driving. Too many of my friends and family do this. They get 20 years hard labor.)
© 2001 by the beastmaster