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May 26, 2001
Every time some kid shoots up a school, the authorities find in the child's room an arsenal of weapons, ammunition, explosives, and violent video games. Then come the talk-shows, editorials, syndicated columns, and public pity-parties blaming the parents of these children. They say things like, "what kind of parents could these kids have if they don't know their children have guns and explosives in their rooms?" I'm here to tell you they have parents like me.
Somebody tell me how I'm supposed to know whether Henry has an uzi in his room if I've never been IN his room? Am I supposed to be clairvoyant? We should quit blaming parents and start giving them more credit. Who went to all the trouble of getting drunk enough to have sex with their spouses and conceive these kids in the first place? Parents, that's who! And if I don't know the difference between plastic explosives and Silly Putty, well EXCUUUSE ME! I'm tired of this blame game. I refuse to "rap" with my kids about "wuz hapnin'" in their lame little worlds because.... Well because they're having more fun than I am. Plus I can't understand them when they've just smoked a joint and have a mouth full of Chips Ahoy and cold milk.
Why don't we put the blame where it belongs---on Hollywood and teachers. I'm not sure what they're teaching these kids in school, but it is NOT responsibility. As for Hollywood, if they would lower the price of admission and eliminate the ratings system, then maybe we could get some of these deviant kids off our streets and into our theaters.
So the next time you hear someone badmouthing parents, punch'em in the chops or pop a cap in their ass.
© 2001 by the beastmaster